SuperBall - Sir Winston Churchill Comes To The Rescue of The Hoffster

One embarrassing episode for the Hoffmann children was when Father in an atypically grumpy mood confiscated our neighbours upstairs the Hogg girls' SuperBall. 

Maureen Hogg 6/4 Oxgangs Avenue

Goodness knows what had happened - perhaps it had hit our window our some such thing. Anyway, the bold Ken Hoffmann confiscated it and put it in the middle drawer of the sideboard. I could just imagine he was daring their parents to come down to the door.

Anyway, it was such a fun toy, that the following day when he was out to work I couldn't resist sneaking it out of 6/2 Oxgangs and going off to play with it. Great fun and typical me, however disaster was about to strike.

The SuperBall did all it said on the pack and (I'm afraid) even more! Like Superman it could literally clear four storey buildings like The Stair with one bound.

Anyway, I'm sure you can guess what happened. In my attempts to make the SuperBall clear The Stair I ended up losing the damn thing. 

PANIC! 

What would happen when the Ogre came home from work and eventually looked into the drawer? 

I racked my brain. 

I suppose I could always throw myself off the top landing on to the shed roof. 

Or 'Now Ken, surely it must have been either of my siblings, Anne or Iain!' 

'Spontaneous combustion, Father?' 

'Are you absolutely sure Pater that that's where you left it?' 

Aye! I don't think so.

I realised the only way to resolve the dilemma was to buy another ball and pass it off as the original. But Mother's purse wasn't handy and I had no money. 

It was only shortly beforehand that I had got rid of my Victorian pennies. I scratched my head and then the light bulb clicked; as part of my coin collecting I'd bought a couple of Churchill Crowns. I knew enough about coins that although they were produced for collectors they were in fact legal tender; two crowns were actually ten bob although they had cost me more than that to buy.

Like Billy Whizz I belted down to Andretti's at Colinton Mains. 

The shop assistant took a bit of persuading that they were legal tender but I eventually persuaded her. New ball purchased for around six shillings I sprinted back home along Oxgangs Road North whilst ripping the wrapper off the Superball to replace the Hoggs' ball before Father arrived home from work. 

Alls well that end well. I'd kept the Ogre at bay - good old Winnie!

Thursday 1st July 1971 - My 15th Birthday

Well I'm no longer 14 and a half as it's my 15th birthday today. I kicked off the morning with my paper round but of course I didn’t venture into Boroughmuir School; after all it is the second last day of term not to mention my birthday! 

Mum and Dad on honeymoon Islay September 1955

I'd be stretching it a bit to say it was a birthday present but Mum and Dad's divorce came through. Rather strange and poignant that it should be on the date of their first born's birth-day; life’s gone full circle. On a happier note I did very well for my birthday. 

I got Aunt Heather's typewriter so perhaps I might do some writing; also a wee transistor radio which will be handy to listen to Tony Blackburn to in the morning when I'm out 'n about doing my paper round and also for listening to the football and Radio Luxembourg in the evening. 

I also got Rags to Riches by Elvis; it’s a great track; and also a fiver from Dad. In the evening we all enjoyed a wee birthday tea with Nana’s fantastic home-made chocolate birthday cake, always a highlight. We all had a good game of football after tea. The day was finished off with a poke of chips from Rissi's; not a bad birthday at all; actually it was a pretty good one all round.